Welcome to My Gratitude Project 2024 where I am celebrating the small things I’m grateful for every day in November.
Nov. 2
Every year in November, I practice 30 days of gratitude.* Taking time to be grateful about what is going right grounds me and helps me focus on what I want more of in my life. Amid epidemic levels of anxiety and uncertainty, practicing gratitude is something we can all do to remind ourselves of what is good. Beauty, kindness, and love surrounds us all—if only we would take time to notice them.
If you want to be happier and more fulfilled, it turns out that the small moments of happiness are more important than the big stuff. A new house or new job only gives you a boost of fulfillment or happiness for so long, and then it becomes just another routine. But sneaking a cookie at midday, walking outside in warm sunshine, or laughing with a friend never gets old. This year, I’m looking at the small stuff, like this mural which I pass by often on Santa Monica Blvd near where I’m living, that brightens my day. Follow me this month for more of what I’m grateful for in my life. I hope it inspires you to notice the little things that contribute to your bigger sense of happiness daily too.
*It might have to be 29 days this year as I was traveling Nov. 1 and missed a day.
Nov. 3
Every day I’m grateful for a little hummingbird just like this guy. Green feathered, ruby throated, with gray wings that seem transparent. He comes to the feeder I’ve put just outside my kitchen window. Sometimes, when he notices me, he turns to eye me through the window. We’re only three feet apart, and even though I’m inside and he’s outside, he is wary of the threat I pose and often flies away.
I live in Los Angeles where concrete abounds over the winter months, I work hard to notice the small glimpses of nature that I see daily, reminding me that no matter how many walls we build, there is a life outside these walls that is beautiful and sweet.
Nov. 4
French fries. I have a weakness for them. I’m a sucker for anything salty, and nothing hits the spot quite like a hot French fry. This seems to be true for most of us.
I almost never order them for myself because, I tell myself, I just want a few. I steal them shamelessly off someone else’s plate as soon as they are within reach. I’m grateful every time I eat a meal with someone who has no qualms about ordering a whole serving of them. It’s instant happiness.
Nov. 5
“Clouds pass. The sky remains.” A long time ago, someone who knew me well gave me a tiny frame with that inscription. It remains on my desk to this day, reminding me that whatever is happening now, there are eternal truths and values that remain unchanged. Even in the darkest times, small acts of kindness, compassion, or beauty, or simply a cloud can remind us that life is essentially good. Grateful for clouds for passing, grateful for the sky that remains.
Nov. 6
I’m grateful to this book, which kept me sane once when I felt my world was crumbling. In so many ways, books have always been my refuge, but this book is not about escape. It offers a way to stay grounded and connected even when the world seems frankly insane. As John Kabat-Zinn says, mindfulness is a way to stay sane in a world filled with chaos. If the title appeals to you, I highly recommend it.
Day 7
The feel of sunlight on my skin is a simple pleasure I enjoy nearly every day. During the winter months, I live in Los Angeles, where it is 72 and sunny nearly every day. It’s a great luxury. Even where it is colder, a little sunlight on your face can brighten and warm the whole day. If you need a little pick-me-up, take a break from whatever you’re doing to step outside, even for a minute, and feel the warming power of the sun. Grateful for the light that shines upon us all.
Nov. 8
I don’t even know how to express my gratitude for the call I had yesterday. I wasn’t expecting the call and certainly wasn’t expecting the caller to break down, but within the first minute, he did. He choked up and went silent. It took him a moment to be able to speak again. He told me of his many problems, a perfect storm of them, all separate but happening at once. My heart went out to him as he described how others had treated him. He thanked me deeply for my patience. I guess what I’m grateful for was his willingness to be vulnerable and my own willingness to simply listen and empathize. It was just a moment of grace and human connection, really, and for that, I’m grateful. It is amazing what we can do together when we are kind.
Day 9: This is my dad, who turned 92 last week. Just grateful to have him around. Love my dad!
Nov. 11
It’s Sunday and I have time to take my dog to the beach. T-shirt weather. Cool sand under our feet. Seagulls riding the air currents and still a few surfers riding waves. It’s grounding and I feel totally present. Grateful for moments of happiness and contentment like this.
Nov. 11: Armistice day was originally recognized on the eleventh hour, of the eleventh day, of the eleventh month after WWI in 1918. My family has a long and intimate history with war, and I am grateful for those who fought on the side of justice and freedom to allow survivors to live in peace. Without the courage of those who fought for those ideals, I literally would not exist. I owe my life to them. This is a photo of my father-in-law, David Foster, who was stationed for a time at Pearl Harbor after WWII. Grateful today for everyone who survived any war, on the field or as a civilian, and praying for more peace in the world as we look to a new year.
Nov. 12
I love a well-run small business, and Ambassador Passport is just such a one. They are cheerful, knowledgeable, and easily make annoying chores—like renewing a passport—easy and pleasant. I walk in, and they help me with the right paperwork, take my photo properly, make sure everything is done just right. A week later, I have a brand-new passport.
I discovered them when I needed a visa for business travel and have been a loyal customer ever since. Dealing with foreign governments is not easy, and they made it a breeze. They can do it by mail, too. I am grateful for people who are supremely good at their job!
Nov 13
I love a good challenge. It keeps me sharp and gets the gears going in my head. I don’t always achieve it, but I always learn something that’s valuable. Even if I learn that I can’t succeed that way, that’s a lesson worth having. And when I do succeed, even if it’s a partial win, I’m grateful to have tried and overcome the obstacles. I know I’ve come farther than if I hadn’t tried.
To be sure, there are good challenges and bad challenges. If something seems impossible, truly out of reach, I shy away or do my best to avoid it. I don’t mind difficult, but it has to seem possible. And without any challenge at all, well, life is just boring.
Turns out, I’m not alone. Harvard researcher Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness, says it best: “People blossom when challenged and wither when threatened.” That sums me up perfectly. How about you?
Nov. 14
This is Nowita Court, one of the walking streets in Venice CA. Secluded, quiet, with beautiful Mediterranean gardens on either side, these streets are a unique feature of this unique neighborhood. Urban planners sometimes do something to surprise and delight urban dwellers, and these walking streets are a great example of something beautiful and unexpected that they didn’t have to give us—but they did. And we are grateful.
Every organization can offer something to surprise and delight their customers and even their employees. Airlines offer early boarding or a free drink to their best customers. Restaurants sometimes offer an amuse bouche between courses or a candy to sweeten the check. Neighborhoods celebrate First Fridays when every business has specials and stays open late. For employees, casual Fridays or summer Fridays are treasured perks. When companies go out of their way to please us, we naturally become more loyal to the organization and curious, checking back often to see what else they might have in store. It’s a positive way to make a difference, boosting customer and employee retention and giving everyone something to smile about. Today I’m offering my gratitude to the people who spend time surprising and delighting us all.
Nov. 15
TGIF, I’m just grateful that it’s Friday! Looking forward to a great, relaxing weekend!
Nov. 16
Today I am grateful for Andy Grove, the legendary CEO of Intel, for writing his book High Output Management and sharing his wisdom and brilliance with us. He is the father of 1:1 meetings, KPIs, and many other indispensable management tools that clarify what we do when we manage other people and define our own work. We also have him to thank for legitimizing business casual wear. Here are a couple snippets worth pondering:
“In businesses that mostly deal with information and know-how, … a rapid divergence develops between power based on position and power based on knowledge… In our business we have to mix knowledge-power people with position-power people daily, and together they make decisions that could affect us for years to come.”
“A manager can do his own job, his individual work, and do it well, but that does not constitute his output. If the manager has a group of people reporting to him or a circle of people influenced by him, the manager’s output must be measured by the output created by his subordinates and associates.”
“Ninety minutes of your time can enhance the quality of your subordinate’s work for two weeks, or for some eighty plus hours, and also upgrade your understanding of what he’s doing.”
Much more to learn from this brilliant man.
Nov. 17
Researchers at the Getty Center have found that Van Gogh’s Irises, as we see them today, are not the same color as Van Gogh saw them. They have faded to blue but once were a brilliant violet. Using Xray and other imaging, they have re-created an image with original pigments. Grateful to artists and scientists who help us see what we never saw before.
Note the yellow in the upper right of the recreation is also more vivid in the recreation. Van Gogh started painting irises in the grounds of the mental hospital where he checked in to treat his depression. Turning something small and beautiful into art was his therapy.
Nov. 18
I am always grateful when someone can explain complicated issues very clearly. Here again, with gratitude, I’m quoting Andy Grove on the stages of problem solving.
“A poor performer has a strong tendency to ignore his problem. Here a manager needs facts and examples so that he can demonstrate its reality. Progress of some sort is made when the subordinate actively denies the existence of a problem rather than ignoring it passively, as before. Evidence can overcome resistance here as well, and we enter the third stage, when the subordinate admits that there is a problem, but maintains it is not his problem. Instead he will blame others, a standard defense mechanism. Using this defense, he can continue to avoid the responsibility and burden of remedying the situation. These three steps usually follow one another in fairly rapid succession. But things tend to get stuck at the blame-others stage. If your subordinate does have a problem, there’s no way of resolving it if he continues to blame it on others. He has to take the biggest step: namely assuming responsibility. He has to say not only that there is a problem but that it is his problem. This is fateful, because it means work: “If it is my problem, I have to do something about it. If I have to do something, it is likely to be unpleasant and will definitely mean a lot of work on my part.” Once responsibility has been assumed, however, finding the solution is relatively easy. This is because the move from blaming others to assuming responsibility constitutes an emotional step, while the move from assuming responsibility to finding the solution is an intellectual one, and the latter is easier.”
When working to solve a problem, keep track of which stage you are in: ignoring, denying, blaming, assuming responsibility, finding a solution.
Nov. 19
Passed by these beautiful yellow roses this morning while walking my dog. My mother used to grow roses like these and loved them. Then I started noticing other flowers, California poppies and century plants. Today I’m grateful to the gardeners who brighten our journey.
Nov. 20
I love a good stretch. I take five minutes to stretch almost every morning, and sometimes again in the evening. It’s a great way to release whatever tension I have been holding onto and getting me grounded in my body and in the present moment. Take a moment to stretch in your day and you’ll be grateful too.
Interested in guided stretching? My very talented niece @ninabartell is starting a stretch company. Check it out at https://www.joinhombody.com/
Nov. 21
A walk with a friend combines two of my greatest pleasures—exercise and connecting. It’s a twofer! Clears my head and fills my heart. Grateful when schedules align to get out with a friend.
Nov. 22
I don’t know about you, but I’m obsessed with scented candles. It’s an instant way to upgrade my day. Just walking past is enough to make the flame dance. This one has eucalyptus and is quintessentially California. Others I love have lavender, patchouli, or jasmine. The scents are endless and beautifully blended. Grateful for the lights that keep us uplifted as the nights get longer.
Nov. 23
No gratitude project is complete without my husband, Gary Foster, seen here hamming it up on a tour of the White House we took earlier this summer. He is the most supportive and wonderful life partner ever. To be sure, he sometimes forgets to listen and can get distracted by his phone on a date night. Still, he is my rock, and I wouldn’t trade him for the world! He’s been traveling this last week so grateful to have him back at home.
Nov. 24
The moon is another wonder that doesn’t get old. A glimpse of it is enough to make me stop and spend a moment in awe and humility. Usually I’m not expecting it, and I don’t look up often enough intentionally. It’s just suddenly there and, for no reason, catches my eye and what is beautiful becomes even more so. There is so much we forget in our rush to do this or that. Grateful for a moment spent in wonder at the night sky or at dusk.
Nov. 25
I don’t know what I’m grateful for in this little clip. The dog? Surely. The splash of the wave, which is what I was trying to photograph, not as successfully as I had hoped unfortunately? It’s just another little moment, so precious, beautiful, maybe mundane too, but also sublime. We always think what we are doing is so important, or what we’re trying to do, and it is, really, I know that, but sometimes I think it’s not about where we’re trying to go that’s important as being right here, present and grateful for where we are. Simply grateful.
Nov. 26
Grateful for this guy in my life, who loves to eat as much as I do, who loves books as much as I do, and who just loves. OK, maybe not so sure about oranges. Emerson once wrote one child can reduce a roomful of adults to blabbering gibberish. He is right. Grateful to feel like a child when I’m with this one any day.
Nov. 28
Thanksgiving, the heart of my gratitude project, and I’m grateful for the people around the table more than I am for the food on it. Fuzzy pictures is just part of it. We’re not trying to be perfect, we’re just enjoying each other’s company and the feeling that we belong to this group of people. There’s nothing like laughing, telling stories, exchanging ideas, and enjoying being a part of something bigger than yourself. Where else can we tolerate differences and still love? Where else can we just be ourselves? Family is forever. Happy Thanksgiving all!